Capo on 1st fret
Verse 1
Some t[C]time ago, at [G/B]Santa's place[Am]place up in the old North [G]Pole
There l[Dm]lived a lump of [Am]anthracite whose p[D]arents called him J[G]oel
J[C]Joel, Joel, the l[G]lump of coal [Am]happy as a lump can [Em]be
He j[F]ust wants to keep S[C]anta warm and m[F]ake the elves coz[G]y
But S[C]Santa Claus had[G/B]had other plans for [Am]Joel one fateful [G]day
"J[Dm]"Joel, you're just the [Am]lump I need come j[D]oin me on my sl[G]eigh"
J[C]Joel, Joel, the l[G]lump of coal [Am]heart leapt up with [Em]joy,
I'll s[F]oon be Santa's pr[C]esent to a l[F]ucky girl or b[G]oy [A7/C#]
Bridge
We'll l[Dm]augh and play together[C] and h[G]old each other tight[F]
Sn[C]uggle under clean white sh[G]eets when we g[F]o to sleep at night[C/E]
Then S[Dm]Santa's elves all laughed at Joel,[C]Joel, "you're [G]in for a surprise[F]
You're n[C]ot a special Christmas gift[G] you're j[F]ust a booby prize[C/E]
What k[Dm]id would ever want you?[C] You're f[G]ilthy as can be[F]
N[C]Now you have to go and live[G]live with [F]one who's been naughty"
"But [C]I make h[F]heat, [D/F#]poor Joel cr[G]ied and[G#dim7] electri[Am]city"
"You pollute the [C7/A#]air with CO2 and m[G7]mercury"
Verse 2
J[C]oel, Joel, the l[G]ump of coal fell d[Am]own upon his k[Em]nees
"I d[F]on't wanna live with a n[C]aughty kid don't m[F]ake me, Santa, pl[G]ease"
But S[C]Santa laughed his [G/B]jolly laugh, "Ho,[Am] Ho, you stupid lum[G]p
You're j[Dm]ust the thing to te[Am]ach this brat that S[D]anta ain't no ch[G]ump"
So [C]off they flew and, be[G/B]before he knew [Am]Joel was in a [G]sack
He cr[Dm]ied and yelled to S[Am]anta Claus, "why d[D]on't we just go b[G]ack?"
Bridge
And t[Dm]then came Christmas morning[C]morning
And, m[G]much to Joel's surprise (Much to Joel'[F]Joel's surprise)
He s[C]saw a boy with the saddest face[G]face
And t[F]tears were in his eyes (Tears were[C/E]were in his eyes)
He [Dm]picked Joel up and held him[C]him
And s[G]said, "you can be my friend (Hey man, l[F]let's be friends)
I wo[C]would've liked some presents b[G]but
You're wh[F]what Santa chose to send (Santa c[C/E]chose to send)
It's t[Dm]true, I've been a naughty boy [C]
And m[G]maybe that's a sin (Maybe th[F]that's a sin)
If th[C]is is how Santa treats the kids[G], I'm j[F]ust glad that I'm not him"
Verse 3
J[C]oel, Joel, the l[G]ump of coal k[Am]new what he must[Em] do
He said, "n[F]"now I know the re[C]reason why [F]I got sent to y[G]ou
Cause wh[C]when a person hurt[G/B]hurts inside it [Am]turns him hard and [G]cruel
But [Dm]I know how to m[Am]ake your pain int[D]o a precious jewel[G]"
"So t[C]take me in your [G/B]hand, young man and sq[Am]squeeze with all your [G]might
Let's t[Dm]turn your pain and [Am]anger into s[D]omething that shines br[G]ight"
Then J[C]oel, Joel, the l[G]ump of coal he g[Am]ave his life a[Em]way
Oh, [F]one good naughty l[C]ittle boy get a d[F]iamond on Chr[G]istmas d[C]ay